Why and How Others Try to Hold You Back from Success
When you’re changing your life for the better, some people will feel the need to get in your way at every turn. Many of them will think they’re helping you, but they aren’t. They don’t want to see you win or become successful, because then they will have to face the fact that they aren’t progressing, they’re jealous, or they fear being left behind. Misery loves company, and they will hold you back like crabs in a barrel.
It’s annoying to figure out that some friends and family aren’t on your side. This something that you have face, handle, and accept if you want to be successful.
See how others might attempt to derail your success:
1. They point out your failed attempts. We’ve all failed many times in the past and they’ve been witness to these efforts. Some people in your life will take the opportunity to toss that back in your face as an attempt to sabotage your efforts.
Let’s say you decide to sell T-shirts with witty sayings on them that cater to your state. You may be reminded by a “friend” that you couldn’t even sell cookies for the class trip in high school. They might even recommend you come up with something a little more sensible to reach for.
2. They’ll try to make you feel guilty. Guilt is a powerful weapon used by many as a manipulation tactic. Sticking to the T-shirt example, you may be told that there’s way too many T-shirt developers already. You may likewise be told that your money could be better spent investing into crypto. Or maybe you should be devoting that time to your sick relative.
3. They try to distract you. “Let’s learn how to fly a plane, like we talked about years ago. Forget those T-shirts.” These are a few of the less devious ways people in your circle may try to sabotage your efforts. The question is, why would they try to stop you at all? It doesn’t seem supportive or helpful in any way, and it’s not! They try to present it that way as to not be obvious that they’re just being selfish by wanting you to stand in place.
There are many reasons why friends and family want to sabotage your efforts to succeed:
1. They want to remain comfortable with their mediocrity. If you do something outstanding, they have to deal with the fact that they haven’t done anything close to amazing. No one wants to feel, let alone be shown, that they’re losing at the game of life. It’s less work and easier to hold you back from winning, than it is for them to deal with their own laziness, insecurities, and fear.
2. Jealousy. While there are some people in general who are genuinely happy to see you win and accomplish something great like, shed 30 pounds, buy a house, or build an empire, there are way more people who are silently jealous. They’ll attempt to stop you from being what they wish they were, successful.
If that doesn’t work, they’ll try any and all attempts to diminish the value of any success you have. They’ll say stuff like, “If I had all of your free time, I could easily start a business from scratch too!”
3. People fear change. Everyone in your life is getting something from you. If they didn’t benefit from the relationship with you, they wouldn’t associate with you at all. If you change, that threatens the status quo. If you then become something different, where exactly does that leave them? It’s psychologically easier for them if you remain the same, so they can continue to benefit from the ‘you’ at this stage in life.
The solution is for you to stay the course, commit to being successful, and continue to push forward despite the objections of those around you. You may want to strongly consider removing people from your life. It’s hard enough breaking into something new without friends and family making it harder to move forward.
Consider keeping your goals to yourself. This way, you’ll get less pushback and rejection from those around you. And about time they figure out what’s going on, you’ll already be well on your way to new heights. Make decisions that are best for your life, dreams, and goals. You don’t need the approval from other people who are against you for one reason or another. Commit to your goals for the reasons that cater to your outcome of success. Don’t worry about anything or anyone else.
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